Critical Observer

<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin5AXmXEILVJrL1adGhpei2IXM_bIRs_LGZdjKbXl3kPrqYB-57oL2rq5z53gVsH4gtd4jYDw5zqDrvWZ5_Q1U5VRq5yUFVPzPU1T8DGqGwmCt0DW1tkqnQk2f3DTuRs9HH6WpeP2dweVr/s1600-h/safe_olympic_sex.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236109901335130530" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin5AXmXEILVJrL1adGhpei2IXM_bIRs_LGZdjKbXl3kPrqYB-57oL2rq5z53gVsH4gtd4jYDw5zqDrvWZ5_Q1U5VRq5yUFVPzPU1T8DGqGwmCt0DW1tkqnQk2f3DTuRs9HH6WpeP2dweVr/s320/safe_olympic_sex.jpg" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 285px; height: 127px;" /></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin5AXmXEILVJrL1adGhpei2IXM_bIRs_LGZdjKbXl3kPrqYB-57oL2rq5z53gVsH4gtd4jYDw5zqDrvWZ5_Q1U5VRq5yUFVPzPU1T8DGqGwmCt0DW1tkqnQk2f3DTuRs9HH6WpeP2dweVr/s1600-h/safe_olympic_sex.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><span><span>Asking a real man what’s your favorite sport is like asking a man what his favorite sexual position is. We like them all! But some are preferred over others for example:</span></span><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBnAVm-aRniB5pNSNNkcBu8lrwFJwRSCtcmgxRDa5ver3mmSr4iwq2PjM96u3IbpsSS6HvDKC2P7YjhP3QzlH0TEARNWdSSQpEGY0GKdoK_mDvkS2l-g0XL7aydoOsG9Nkwo3bJddrvZjo/s1600-h/golfer_logo.gif" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236113899158482194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBnAVm-aRniB5pNSNNkcBu8lrwFJwRSCtcmgxRDa5ver3mmSr4iwq2PjM96u3IbpsSS6HvDKC2P7YjhP3QzlH0TEARNWdSSQpEGY0GKdoK_mDvkS2l-g0XL7aydoOsG9Nkwo3bJddrvZjo/s200/golfer_logo.gif" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 102px; height: 126px;" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br />Golf is like getting a blow job</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > because there is very little actual </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >athletic activity and rich white guys love it. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br /><br /></span><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQv4pcCaErspcHqDkD0-dhuCcdTec1S9I-oMzU6aUwAbztvACQtRrn69M4Mqk9BlSFxki53Hu9phnDefPxTEsi8CD2k_Calmuu99DrhwBc9tH0zTBwDvkRuwP6nrx6V-aD7SpnH22GvdGD/s1600-h/0501+Baseball+Logo.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236113888973192546" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQv4pcCaErspcHqDkD0-dhuCcdTec1S9I-oMzU6aUwAbztvACQtRrn69M4Mqk9BlSFxki53Hu9phnDefPxTEsi8CD2k_Calmuu99DrhwBc9tH0zTBwDvkRuwP6nrx6V-aD7SpnH22GvdGD/s200/0501+Baseball+Logo.jpg" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 109px; height: 103px;" /></a><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Baseball is like the missionary position, its steady and reliable. Nothing fancy but it keeps a good pace and gets the job done.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNbTExX7zN0snuazuxZtX7MT6vMqWAT3yWfTDJIL6YEWg405oaLtt1pxDK61fIPF5jR4Q-h8vc6-r1CCEjkBRy5kKCc_VNyDeUkH4S8QKgeD_mXoHoT3perdyzD4O4934v4eyLYtqIlxSV/s1600-h/SP0729.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236113902380449106" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNbTExX7zN0snuazuxZtX7MT6vMqWAT3yWfTDJIL6YEWg405oaLtt1pxDK61fIPF5jR4Q-h8vc6-r1CCEjkBRy5kKCc_VNyDeUkH4S8QKgeD_mXoHoT3perdyzD4O4934v4eyLYtqIlxSV/s200/SP0729.JPG" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 121px; height: 93px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Football is </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >like</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > doggy style, cuz it’s action </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Packed and some one is bound to get sacked. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkZjblWs3zsdbpbjsedaA1DkrhxjI6cxW22b4iKBtxb65E7ZX_975YGsjboNx0jLt6fRVZcYIYJPLVkRwF9cNmmuA5sp1PtdWyDwQi5f5ZTJV8CZf7lrmmiIDVn8x5RYT-UC5Q0GwCFaqs/s1600-h/0504+Hockey+Sticks+%26+Puck.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236113893759268658" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkZjblWs3zsdbpbjsedaA1DkrhxjI6cxW22b4iKBtxb65E7ZX_975YGsjboNx0jLt6fRVZcYIYJPLVkRwF9cNmmuA5sp1PtdWyDwQi5f5ZTJV8CZf7lrmmiIDVn8x5RYT-UC5Q0GwCFaqs/s200/0504+Hockey+Sticks+%26+Puck.jpg" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 104px; height: 84px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Hockey is like the Knees on Chest Position cuz there’s a lot of checking and there is a significant possibility it will result in a </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >shoot-out.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br /><br /><br /></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFN3ssDNGkTDbScImjrjY7gRxrXq1yg1SRJUNVqPKJPgkxuMVK-ndrzI7cG64PlLZMS6p-OhsejSe_4zMUJX0DvR_QjXqvk_RiuGyc7mxo77qD0TNhUaBZ2EVV-S7WiIEy3PwQEE7olIjK/s1600-h/0499+Basketball+%26+Net.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236113886158659490" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFN3ssDNGkTDbScImjrjY7gRxrXq1yg1SRJUNVqPKJPgkxuMVK-ndrzI7cG64PlLZMS6p-OhsejSe_4zMUJX0DvR_QjXqvk_RiuGyc7mxo77qD0TNhUaBZ2EVV-S7WiIEy3PwQEE7olIjK/s200/0499+Basketball+%26+Net.jpg" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 103px; height: 87px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Basketball is like the reverse cowgirl, cuz you need to be the floor general and hit your jump shots.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" > </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" ><br /><br /><br /><br /></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiJwOIDtUNuPYNHmmNE_qdusEfXKgGUY2tMufxrSOSE6uUCgusGb4OY8ge6yELdB4SNuDmLryxpAcsUR6T6qatrDaV35-UZM7pLX9CyvAYfQTUgNoPUd6Enn2aTq1cWjZFG5JOuDamkwi-/s1600-h/Wrestling+logo.gif" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236114024867267666" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiJwOIDtUNuPYNHmmNE_qdusEfXKgGUY2tMufxrSOSE6uUCgusGb4OY8ge6yELdB4SNuDmLryxpAcsUR6T6qatrDaV35-UZM7pLX9CyvAYfQTUgNoPUd6Enn2aTq1cWjZFG5JOuDamkwi-/s200/Wrestling+logo.gif" style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 103px; height: 87px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51);font-family:verdana;" >Finally…Anal is like professional wrestling because the moves are real but the outcome is predetermined. Plus, the girl needs to be drunk to enjoy it…usually.</span></div></div>

Sexual Positions and Sports: A Practice in Metaphorical Comparison

Asking a real man what’s your favorite sport is like asking a man what his favorite sexual position is. We like them all! But some a...

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I am aware that this post is a few weeks late because the Stanley Cup Finals ended a few weeks ago and most people have moved on to other things. But, there is a method to my madness and since the final Nielsen ratings for the Stanley Cup Finals recently came out, I would like to address something Mr. Tiger Woods recently said.<br />At a press conference a few weeks ago, a reporter asked Tiger, who he was rooting for in the Stanley Cup finals and this was his response:<br />"I don't really care...I don't think anybody really watches hockey anymore."<br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/4f9hfH_zGKE&hl=en"><br /><br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/4f9hfH_zGKE&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" height="344" width="425"></embed></object><br />Who does Tiger think he is, The King of Sports Media? You do not know shit about what people watch. In order to prove this, lets take a look at the ratings from the Stanley Cup finals.<br />Game 5 of the Finals, a triple overtime thriller did a 3.8 rating with a 7 share. That is roughly 6.25 million viewers, plus an additional 3.4 million households in Canada tuned in as well. Not too shabby, for a sport that was left for dead just a few years ago. As for game 6, when the Red Wings clinched the Cup over the Penguins, the ratings were even higher. In fact, in the state of Michigan 45% of all households tuned into the game. BOOYA!<br />As for golf, people are not tuning to watch golf they are tuning in to watch Tiger pretend to be a real athlete. Ratings for the recent Memorial tournament, which Woods missed, plunged 31 percent from last year. If Tiger ain't playing then no one is watching. Plus, since when is golf even a sport? Since when is a recreational activity that requires no Athletic ability, agility or stamina considered a sport. All that you need to be a golfer is the ability to walk and good concentration. If that was a criteria for a sport then we would have competitive furniture moving. In fact, you would probably exert more energy moving furniture. GOLF is NOT a SPORT! Golf is what real athletes do in the off season in order to relax and get some fresh air. Golf is as much a sport as Ping-Pong, Billiards or Bowling.<br />So, Tiger until you take the Ice and get checked by a Swede (and i don't mean your wife), SHUT THE F*CK UP!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVUMQV_ajSBKQA1-iS76JEaQONLLCeGDS1ElS8GxBRQtqTUe7twdVtgWipC8nA_gBwtYO0fy8KfUkfpFhSM9hmTgzSsmbbUjyvCRFWt_wnPUSsu-mlOy7RwFgnX-QwKDRd07fEcGAJUyyE/s1600-h/malone.bmp"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5213642692279766578" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVUMQV_ajSBKQA1-iS76JEaQONLLCeGDS1ElS8GxBRQtqTUe7twdVtgWipC8nA_gBwtYO0fy8KfUkfpFhSM9hmTgzSsmbbUjyvCRFWt_wnPUSsu-mlOy7RwFgnX-QwKDRd07fEcGAJUyyE/s200/malone.bmp" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; float: left;" /></a>The worst Hockey player in the NHL posses more athleticism in his playoff beard then you do in your entire body. You took 3 months off for a knee operation and then bitched about it hurting your game like a little girl. Ryan Malone of the Pittsburgh Penguins had his nose broken twice in one series and barely missed any ice time.<br />And if there is still any debate weather golf is a sport, please refer to Mr. Happy Gilmour. If a lousy hockey Player really wanted to he could become a world class golfer. If a Golfer wanted to become a Hockey player, he would need to powder up his "vag" and prepare to be humiliated. If Tiger Woods were a real man he would lace up the skates and show us what he can do. Instead he is a corporate shill who happens to be good at golf. He can't even catch a gopher...LAME!<br /><br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/2hA3_rihmcg&hl=en"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/2hA3_rihmcg&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" height="344" width="425"></embed></object>

F#%K Tiger Woods!

I am aware that this post is a few weeks late because the Stanley Cup Finals ended a few weeks ago and most people have moved on to other th...

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