It's just F'ing water !!!

So I'm sitting here in the office eating breakfast, (bacon, egg and cheese. It's ace!) drinking my tea, when the water delivery guy busts through the door unannounced with two bottles of Maine's finest on his shoulders. The man was getting ready to refill the poor excuse for a water fountain, water cooler rather, that we have here, that I assume livestock would avoid if given the opportunity to indulge in it's watery goodness. No one here is really into Hydrogen Dioxidal hygiene, especially around the water cooler area (The thing resembles the outside bottom part of an oven door after cooking a massive Thanksgiving meal, mixed with sticky movie theater floor.) But anyways, the water boy walks in and asks "Which y'all want? Uhhh, Deer Park or... Poland Spring?" And I'm sitting here thinking this idiot himself just sprung out of Poland. (Ooh, a Poland joke. Sue me) Does it make a fucking a difference which water goes in the fucking cooler? It's WATER! Just put in the cheapest bottle in the damn fountain and fuck off. Why do they feel the need to ask these dumb ass questions? To feel more important I suppose, there's nothing better when the company you work makes you feel like your job is important. But with that said, you're not working in a computer store jackass! If you were fixing a computer here, then it would make a difference whether its one or the other, Vista or XP, paper or plastic, papers or blunts, beer or liquor, YouTube or Flickr. But it's not, its just fucking water. But I guess they have to ask because they themselves aren't sure about the question (You know, because THEY DELIVER FUCKING WATER for a living!) which water would be better for our cooler. I mean do we really have to be bothered in order to choose between the containers of water? What the hell is going here? Why is he asking me which type of water I want like it's Coke and Pepsi? Someone let me know because apparently I didn't get the fucking memo. I'm sure all that water comes out the same filthy factories, from the same stupid hoses that fill the same stupid fucking water bottles up. There no way Poland Spring or Deer Park or any other water really come from a stream! You know why? Cause deer shit in the stream. So put that water bottle on and get the fuck out of my office you prick!