MLB Ethnic All-stars: It ain’t where you at, It’s where your from!

As many of you know the Olympics are set to begin today. Something that many of you don't know is that this is the last year that Baseball and Softball will be featured as Olympic sports. The IOC argues that there are not enough competitive countries to make the sport Olympiad worthy. USA Softball always wins the Gold and MLB refuses to send its players to represent the US or any other country for that matter. So, every countries baseball rosters are filled with amateurs and nobodies. I for one am all for the idea of getting rid of Baseball because it may allow Rugby to finally become an Olympic Sport. I played Rugby in College and I think it deserves to be an Olympic sport. But, alas the IOC made their decision and decided to include Squash and Karate instead, but not really as the article points out.

Baseball has a chance to get back into the Olympics for 2016, but they have to play their cards right. They cannot base it on countries or they are dead in the water. The Olympic squads have to be based on Ethnicity. This will provide for a must-see event that will be ultra competitive.

In order to get the ball rolling, I compiled the All-time greatest baseball teams based on Ethnicity. Each team consists of sixteen players and one manager and I will be listing them in alphabetical order in order to avoid any problems.

Up first, hailing from the far east, they are like untamed beasts:

The Amazin' Asians

C Kurt Suzuki
1B Hee Sop Choi
2B Tadahito Iguchi
3B Norihiro Nakamura
SS Kazuo Matsui
OF Kosuke Fukudome
OF Hideki Matsui
OF Ichiro Suzuki
DH So Taguchi
Utility IF Akinori Iwamura
P Chien-Ming Wang
P Daisuke Matsuzaka
P Hideo Nomo
P Chan Ho Park
RP Hideki Okajima
Closer Takashi Saito
BP C Kenji Johjima
Manager Akira Ogi

Their ancestors Hail from the Dark Continent and they are flauntin' it:

The Black Ballers

C Roy Campanella
1B Willie McCovey
2B Jackie Robinson
3B Bobby Bonilla
SS Ozzie Smith
OF Willie Mays
OF Barry Bonds
OF Hank Aaron
DH Frank Thomas
Utility IF Ricky Henderson
P Bob Gibson
P Vida Blue
P Dock Ellis
P Don Newcombe
RP Satchel Paige
Closer Lee Smith
BP C Earl Battey
Manager Buck O'Neil

Hailing from across the border, they will dominate your batting order:

The Hispanic Panic

C Ivan Rodriguez
1B Albert Pujols
2B Rod Carew
3B Miguel Cabrera
SS Alex Rodriguez
OF Roberto Clemente
OF Manny Ramirez
OF Vladimir Guerrero
DH David Ortiz
Utility IF Tony Pérez
P Pedro Martinez
P Juan Marichal
P Fernando Valenzuela
P Johan Santana
RP Francisco Cordero
Closer Mariano Rivera
BP C Iván Rodríguez
Manager Ozzie Guillen

Hailing from the promised land, they survive every last stand:
The Hammerin' Hebrews

C Mike Lieberthal
1B Hank Greenberg
2B Ian Kinsler
3B Al Rosen
SS Lou Boudreau
OF Shawn Green
OF Ryan Braun
OF Sid Gordon
DH Ron Blomberg
Utility IF Kevin Youkilis
P Sandy Koufax
P Ken Holtzman
P Jason Marquis
P Steve Stone
RP Scott Schoeneweis
Closer Larry Sherry
BP C Brad Ausmus

Manager Whitey Herzog

Hailing from the country shaped like a boot, they pack plenty of attitude:
The Italian Stallions

C Joe Torre
1B Jason Giambi
2B Mark DeRosa
3B Ken Caminiti
SS Phil Rizzuto
OF Joe DiMaggio
OF Dom DiMaggio
OF Joe Pepitone
IF Utility Ron Santo
DH Mike Piazza
P Mike Mussina
P Sal Maglie
P Ralph Branca
P Barry Zito
RP John Franco
Closer Dave Righetti
BP Catcher Mike Scioscia
Manager Tony La Russa

Hailing from the land of the Celts, they are not here to make amends:

The Luck O' The Irish

C Jimmy Archer
1B Stuffy McInnis
2B Kid Gleason
3B John McGraw
SS Jimmy Hallinan
OF Paul O'Neill
OF Adam Dunn
OF Jim O'Rourke
IF Utility Roger Connor
DH Mark McGuire
P Whitey Ford
P Nolan Ryan
P Pud Galvin
P Jack McDowell
RP Mickey McDermott
Closer John Wetteland
BP Catcher Tim McCarver
Manager Connie Mack

Last but certainly not least, they run your lives and you don't even know it:

The White Wasps

C Johnny Bench
1B Lou Gehrig
2B Rogers Hornsby
3B Mike Schmidt
SS Honus Wagner
OF Babe Ruth
OF Ted Williams
OF Ty Cobb
DH Jim Thome
Utility IF Jimmie Foxx
P Cy Young
P Roger Clemens
P Warren Spahn
P Christy Mathewson
RP Dennis Eckersley
Closer Billy Wagner
BP C Gary Carter
Manager Bobby Cox

Be Proud of who you are but remember there is thin line between Patriotism and Fascism. Enjoy the Olympics!

Happy Crazy Eights!