1. "I'm going to set up a foundation for the world. I'm going to take the money and start building cities all over the world. I'm a comet."-- Former Knicks guard Stephon Marbury
  2. "Something vegetarian, like grilled cheese or chicken fingers."-- Rapper/actress Eve
  3. "The trouble with Twitter, the instantness of it, too many twits might make a twat." -- David Cameron, British Conservative Party leader.
  4. "I think it has some sort of stone."
    -- Lorrie Nantz, testifying in her divorce trial from sportscaster Jim Nantz that she couldn't remember what a $12,000 necklace she purchased one month earlier looked like
  5. "Some employees may prefer weapons such as chain saws, baseball bats and explosives that have been shown to be effective against zombies." -- University of Florida in a disaster preparedness plan on its e-Learning website on how to deal with a campus-wide zombie attack.
  6. "I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like O.J., cutting everybody's throat. You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can't go to anymore, you're driving through downtown Clearwater and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife … I totally understand O.J. I get it."
    -- Professional wrestler Hulk Hogan
  7. "Cheech and Chong would have had a hard time smoking that much."
    -- Butler County (Ohio) judge Craig Hedric, on former NBA player Corie Blount claiming 29 pounds of marijuana were for personal use
  8. "I hope he does get back. The first thing I would do if I get back on the golf course, I would go looking for Jesper Parnevik and I would beat his ass … There is a line that you don't cross over."
    -- Pro Football Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor, on Tiger Woods
  9. "Jedis are very welcome to shop in our stores although we would ask them to remove their hoods. … Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda and Luke Skywalker all appeared hoodless without ever going over to the Dark Side. … If Jedis walk around our stores with their hoods on, they'll miss lots of special offers."
    -- Unidentified spokesman for British supermarket chain Tesco, in response to accusations of discrimination against the Jedi "religion"
  10. "After we warm up before a game, I gotta take a dump. It's a huge benefit to release that gas you don't need. The facilities are beautiful. We're spoiled. If I get a good one, I know I'm gonna score two touchdowns."
    -- Jets running back Leon Washington
  11. "I have only two passions: space exploration and hip-hop." -- Astronaut Buzz Aldrin, 79, who is producing a single with rapper Snoop Dogg.
  12. "I don't know anything about cars...a business is a business, and I think I can learn" -- Edward Whitacre Jr., newly appointed chairman of GM
  13. "When you face such an overwhelming challenge as global climate change, it can be daunting - it's kind of like trying to lose weight." -- US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.
  14. "I know lots of people that take cocaine three nights a week and get up and go to work every day, no problem. But we never hear that side of the story." -- Singer Lily Allen.
  15. “Our goal is to raise money for charity, but also to put Coppertone out of business. You can be charitable, but still be a bloodthirsty capitalist.” -- Will Ferrell, on his Cancer for College sunscreen, which raises money to help cancer survivors afford school



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