"The Rock Music-Baseball-Kabbalah-Celebrity Love Clusterfuck"

Madonna V. Cynthia Rodriguez V. A-Rod V. Lenny Kravitz

























Who is Writing this stuff, Seriously?
This is like a bad episode of Celebrity wife swap.
I guess the worlds of rock and sports cross-pollinate in to a weird love trapezoid.
I for one am look forward to seeing a Madonna and Cyn-Rod cat fight/make out session.
I am still surprised no one has made this into a reality show yet, or at least a made for TV movie.
This is Gold people, get off your laurels and create this cluster fuck for the masses to enjoy.
Somehow Kabbalah got mixed into this as well. Now that is some good publicity. (Catholicism should take some notes, the whole boy touching thing is so 2003, celebrity scandals is where its at!)
Madonna in a statement said “ I Have nothing to do with the state of his marriage or what spiritual path he may choose to study,” this is apparently a reference to reports that the singer had introduced the ballplayer to Kabbalah, also known as Jewish mysticism.
Here is a quick Breakdown of what 10 “truths” of Kabbalah
(will)
(wisdom)
(understanding)
(loving kindness)
(judgement)
(harmony)
(victory)
(glory)
(foundation)
(sovereignty)

I once sat in on a lecture on Kabbalah, and let me tell you, it is freaking complicated and if A-rod can master Kabbalah, then maybe just maybe he can finally hit in the playoffs. Ouch, yea that one stung a lil’ didn't it?
But, Hey the Yanks have won 8 in a row since the All-star break. So maybe all this high-drama is motivating A-Rod somewhat. Oh, and did I mention that Madonna and Lenny Kravitz (the artist formerly known as Romeo Blue) had a fling back in the mid-90’s.
Anyhow, my over/under on an A-Rod, Cyn-Rod, Madonna, L-Krav Orgy happening is 90 days. Any takers? I am willing to give 69 to 1 odds.

~G9D, Contributing Satirist and Womanizer